I wake up from my nap only to find myself still far away from home. The FX, which carried me from Megamall snaked its way across V. Mapa. Stepping on the gas must be the driver's secret addiction, for no matter how busy the street is, he races ahead of other cars to beat the red light waiting along Ramon Magsaysay Boulevard.

Looking outside the window, I see grey clouds marching. There must have been a brief shower while I wandered in dreamland, only to find the place empty. Between the heaving clouds are tiny rifts revealing a pastel orange sky. The sun must be doing her final encore, I thought, and the wind, sympathizing with the light worshipers chases the Cumulus and Nimbus away so the sun dance could be seen on the ground before leaving for sunless lands.

The soft hum of the car's engine lulls me back to sleep. The earphones plugged on my ears still play Sarah Mclachlan, Paula Cole and Goo Goo Dolls songs from a generation I belong. A slight accidental nudge, a sudden stepping of the break, the person seated next to me slamming the door as she departs away from the vehicle; a sudden squall making its way inside the crammed space where my body is wedged and finally, I am roused back to life to find myself almost home.

Stepping outside the car, I feel the cold breeze touching my skin. The damp ground, whose scent wafting under my nose induces thoughts of rustling leaves and tiny droplets falling gently to the ground. There is a tree not far from my spot. Its moist evergreen leaves reflect the last of the sun's rays before it too finally fades beyond the horizon. Catching a glimpse of the sky, I find a palette of blue and orange enmeshed to create shades only seen on day breaks.

The wind blows once again as I reach the street corner. The entrance to my house is just but a stone throw away. While kids dash as they try to tag one another; and couples stroll with their hands locked in union; as mothers clutch their infants close to their breasts and men, coming into terms with old age resign to staring at youthful boys walking pass them.

I realize

That in the hours we are most alive, we forget how time quickly passes a day from our lives.

Upon arrival this morning from work, I sent a text message to an employee from our Sikyu Agency:

Gud am tita beatrice*. Pakitanong naman kay madame viola* kung kelan ko pede pasok tseke ni mama. Kakahiya man pero pambibili rin nya kc gamot un. Salamat ng marami!

Acknowledging our status being part owners of the company, she gave assurances that the message will be relayed to the comptroller. True to her word, I received a text message a few hours after going to sleep.

Sir Galen pwede u na daw po dpcit un check nio.

Like anyone who is desperate to boost his funds, I got out of the bed despite a woozy head and went straight to the bank. I didn't tell anyone about the green light, especially to my mother who has already lost faith that she'll ever get her share in our family business.

---

There was no queue in the bank, but it took almost an eternity for the teller to get my cheque and process it for verification. Signatures were matched according to their data and so was the background check of company the cheque represents. Much as I would like to put my hopes up, that finally, the funds we need will be secured, reminding myself time and again not to be too optimistic may save me from a future heartache.

I crossed my fingers, and prayed for a miracle.

But the almighty succintly said, it is best to wait:

"Sir inform ko lang kayo na three days clearing po itong cheque."

"Huh paano magiging 3 days clearing yan eh galing sa bank niyo yung cheque."

Everything became silent, only the tapping of the keyboard could be heard from our corner.

"Kasi po sir, insufficient fund po yung [insert name of sikyu agency] eh. Kung gusto niyo, deposit niyo na lang po yan at tingnan natin after three days kung magkakaroon na siya ng funds."

"Ano mangyayari kung within three days eh wala pa rin siyang funds?"

"Bagbobounce po yung tseke. Magkakaroon ng problema yung [insert name of sikyu agency]

"Ganun ba?"

---

Principles dictate that we should look after the greater good of many before satisfying the needs of the few. That is why whenever my mom pour out her frustration about the status of our family business, I always tell her that we should be thankful that it remains in operation no matter how cash strapped it is.

It is always a choice to give up my own ascent to power and return to look after our interest in my late father's enterprise. But doing so may only complicate the recession we already feel at home.

Situation demands sacrifice. The price should the risk fail may further jeopardize everything my mother and the comptroller had worked for. The matter requires understanding and being used to these kind of shortcomings, I took a deep breath before giving my verdict.

"Sige bawiin ko na lang yung tseke."

"Okay sir, tanong niyo na lang sa [insert the name of sikyu agency here] kung kelan sila magkakaroon ng sufficient funds para madeposit niyo na."

"Ganun na nga lang. Thank you ha!"

Pretending my goals were fulfilled, I left the bank as quietly as I arrived.